My Inappropriate Christmas E-Card

Merry Christmas, everybody!

We’re Going Down!

So all of the United States is talking about about our governor. Everyone in Illinois, however, is talking about how awful the roads are and how terrible the weather has been. Why? Because our LEGO-headed governor being a corrupt douchebag is not news to us. I was seriously surprised to not see this headline in the local papers:
CORRUPTION IN ILLINOIS POLITICS; DOZENS SHOCKED.

Our state hemorrhages money like there’s no tomorrow. We pay taxes out our asses, but do we see results? No. Never. In fact, it came out recently that they’re not doing any preventive plowing (plowing before the baddest parts of snowstorm have hit) or salting the streets where I live because it’s too costly.
Excuse me? I pay enormous amounts of city taxes, sales taxes (the highest in the whole country), state taxes, road tolls, and I even pay for those stupid city stickers so the state can run efficiently and make my life easier. Now they say they won’t even freaking plow the streets in a productive manner because it’s expensive? I’m sorry, but when you have record highs for both automobile accidents and snowfall in a single day and it takes someone (me) an hour and a half to drive three miles, you should pony up a few bucks to get the damn streets plowed. It’s ridiculous.

After living in this state for several years and seeing the administrative incompetence in how money is distributed through our local government, I’m beginning to see Rush Limbaugh’s perspective on the political slur of Tax-and-Spendocrats.

But I didn’t come here to bitch. (“Too late.”) I came here to brag about fulfilling a dream I never knew I had.

Cinematic Titanic, Joel Hodgson’s latest pet project, is coming to perform LIVE in Chicago, and I have tickets to go tomorrow. Jealous? I thought so. *upturns nose, walks away*

This is not someone’s birthday

Today marks the birthday of surrealist painter René Magritte, who would be 110 years old if he were alive today. Magritte is one of my favorite artists, having an unmistakable style and a complex view of the world. He was not only an excellent craftsman, but he was a thinker and a conceptual master. He challenged perceptions and always used his art to illustrate complex thoughts. Each work of his was layered and full of imagery that required analysis and multiple views. His paintings felt like dreams come alive, and every one of them is excellently twisted. He truly defined what surrealism was.

For those who want to know more about me and would like engage me on an artistic level, allow me to list some of my personal favorite artists.
1) Classical (Renaissance, Baroque, etc.) – Caravaggio
2) Surrealist – René Magritte
3) Abstract – Georges Braque
4) Contemporary – Norman Rockwell
5) Still Alive – Alex Ross (because I’m a nerd)

That’s just a handful. And like having to pick my favorite movie, these might all change tomorrow. So right now, what’s some of your favorite artists?

It’s been awhile kids!

Well, I’ve been gone awhile, and a lot has happened since my last post. Halloween had come and gone and Thanksgiving is nearly here. I had read that graphic novel about the Joker I was talking about.* I’ve made a ton more of my Inappropriate Soundtracks, and I have been picked up by a British movie blogging site to provide more HILARIOUS videos. I’ve continued writing my own online comic that has yet to come to fruition, but I am inching ever closer. I’ve rekindled friendships from days past, and my long-lasting, long-distance relationship with a girl I’m just crazy about will soon no longer be long-distance, as she comes back here in about a month.
For the first time in a long while, I can honestly say that I am feeling truly happy and fulfilled.

Oh, and also the first ever African-American president was elected… which is kind of a big deal.

Unfortunately, that’s all you’re getting out of me at the moment. I honestly don’t have much to report. I just thought I’d stop by and give everyone an update. But I leave you with a fun little question to think about…

BOONE’S TRICK QUESTION OF THE DAY!
What color was the sky in Ancient Greece?

I shall divulge the answer after I have heard either the right answer or enough wrong ones to force me to blab. Before you answer, keep in mind that this is a trick question.

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*It’s scary as all hell. I can honestly say that it is the most gruesome, terrifying portrayal of the Joker ever. Ever. A word of caution for those with delicate sensibilities; it’s very violent and very graphic. You’ve been warned.

Election ‘08

I present to you the most compelling reason to vote you will ever see.

Ever.

The Current Economic Downturn

The current economic crisis explained in 18 seconds….

And The Kids in the Hall have a different take….

Yes, okay, I know I’ve been pretty heavy on the YouTube crap. Believe me, I know. I’ll get to work soon and actually have something to write about in the near future. But for now, enjoy the videos.

A New Low

Have you seen the latest attack ad that John McCain has run against Barack Obama? No? Well, now you can! But the question is, do you want to?

McCain Claims Obama Supports Teaching Sex-Ed to Kindergartners.

Wow…. I mean, just…. Wow.

I didn’t think I’d ever see an actual, serious political ad like that, did you? It feels like it should be in a sketch for a comedy show, doesn’t it? I would imagine that’s got to be a new low in fabricating nonsense and twisting the truth in a political attack ad… at least in this election, that is.

If you ask me, this latest ad from McCain is at least as despicably low as the “Daisy H-Bomb” ad that Johnson ran against Goldwater in ‘64, or the “wolves” ad that Bush ran in ‘04. However, due to McCain’s ad looking so banal and ordinary and just like every other quickly-produced attack ad, it might not be remembered beyond this election, if at all.

Now while the “sexy Kindergartners” ad (that’s what I’m calling it) isn’t as high in production value as some other ads, the message is still pretty clear: “John McCain is racist and sexist.”
No, wait… that’s not it. The message is that regardless of your political affiliation, you have to admit that, at this point, McCain’s camp is just grasping at straws.

But all of this begs the quesiton: If McCain has already gone this far, why not just say that Obama kicks puppies and eats kittens?
C’mon and get with it, McCain! You’ve crossed a line — might as well have fun with it. Just grow a sack and say that Obama spends his evenings taking mescaline, dressing up like a clown and murdering orphans in their sleep.

Now THAT’S what I call political discourse!