During this past week at work, for some bizarre reason, I kept getting awful songs stuck in my head. I mean, really, REALLY awful songs. I’m talking pants-crappingly stupid songs that go in your ear, enter your skull, burrow deep into your cerebral cortex, lay eggs and then hatch their dumblings, who then devour your brain from the inside out.
“So you heard these songs on the radio and they got stuck in your head all day?” I hear you ask.
No. Inexplicably, these songs were already in my head from God-only-knows when or how. They appeared with absolutely no provocation and they refused to get out. Not only that, but the songs kept popping up in my head at inappropriate times and they wouldn’t stop playing in my mind until they completely killed my frontal lobe and ate the backs of my eyeballs.
And because misery loves company, I’m going to subject these terrible songs onto you, my reading public. So enjoy. Or don’t.
I hope this was as of a complete waste of your time as it was mine. And I refuse to apologize for inflicting any lasting brain damage.